I think once you've made your boundaries clear, as you said you have, and someone violates one or more of them, there needs to be memorable accountability so that they know you're serious.

If you get angry and tell him not to do that again but he does it again anyway, then when he does it again you get angry and say, "I told you not to do that again" but then he does it again anyway, then the accountability was not memorable.

When I was married, if my wife said, "If you ever do that again, you're going to…

Paul Colaianni

Host of The Overwhelmed Brain and Love and Abuse podcasts. Visit theoverwhelmedbrain.com and loveandabuse.com for more information.

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